assoholics

Booty Brigade says:

Jack keeping it truth: them MEGA boxes with like 18 lbs of cardboard, and another 7 feet of molded plastic on the inside.

THEN, if you got the tape from the seedy, corner porno spot (which I certainly did), you had to

1) go all in the back of the store on the hush with your baseball cap pulled down real low,

2) slip in past the see-through curtain, and underneath the surveillance video camera they put only on that one closet-sized space,

3) go around dude in the corner tryna get his nutt off by looking at as many covers as he can without actually renting the tape,

4) slip OUT the same claustrophobic area with your ish, steady looking for Purell (even before them cats even MADE Purell),

5) do some Ghost Protocol ish up to the register, hoping the neighbor whose house you looked after while they was on vacay don’t catch you tryna get your private moments on,

6) hope for sure the checkout clerk ain’t some phat ass Philly, who’s gonna look at your all screw face while you tryna set up your private moments, and you and she both know that unless the bish on tape is hotter than she is, she’ll be on the mental when you pop in that tape,

7) End up having to do some “Italian Job” nonsense tryna open that double-secret probation blue plastic VHS case they got the tape in, and of course

8) be kind, rewind (lest you catch a $1 per tape rewind fee the NExT time you have to go through this same bullshit again)

Oh yeah, Booty B recalls the protocol